Sunday, January 10, 2010

To speak or not to speak.

There are so many things I want to say. But so many times that I feel like I have to censor what I really feel for the sake of keeping the peace; for the sake of being polite. But sometimes, I feel like what I feel might be what someone needs to hear. After all, sometimes a wake up call is exactly what people need to get them back on track.

The hard part is that as a woman, if I'm blunt and speak my mind, then I'm not perceived as not being a nice person. So I keep my real thoughts to myself, which makes me seem passive.

I want to find the middle ground...

Friday, January 08, 2010

Reflections (No Resolutions)

I applaud anyone who makes the decision to make a change and can actually stick to it. That's what New Year's resolutions are all about. I, on the other hand, can't bear to set myself up for failure...not at the beginning of the year. So I don't make New Year's resolutions. However, I do think self reflection and self correction is always in order and appropriate throughout the year.


For the next minutes, indulge me as I do some outward reflecting.


I'm not a political person, but no one can deny the history-making moment on January 20, 2009 when Barack Obama was sworn in as the first African-American president. Many people were happy and many were not. Some think that he can solve all our problems and some believe that he's a socialist bent on having the government take over every facet of our lives...NO COMMENT.


Sarah Palin - After losing the election in November, Sarah Palin decided to step down as governor of Alaska. She told Oprah that she had reached a point in her office where she could not effectively accomplish the things she wanted to do for her state. You know, the republican party used Sarah Palin to get votes. But I think they didn't realize that Sarah Palin is not the kind of person who will go away quietly. She wrote a book after the McCain camp threw her under the bus after losing the election. In her book, Palin basically threw them under the bus and rode it back and forth... back and forth. Don't get me wrong, I still question her ability to answer a simple question. But I do think that it's good that she's speaking up for herself.


Michael Jackson - I don't think anyone saw this coming. The day that Michael Jackon died was probably the saddest day of the year. You always hear that phrase, "the day the music died" and I have to say that on June 25th, it felt like that phrase actually came true. The crazy thing about Michael Jackson's death is that it seemed to cause as much division among the country as the presidential election. There's never any good that comes out of a person's death. But if there is a lesson to be learned, it is this: Prescription drug abuse is out of control in our country. What's worse, there are doctors who enable and even assist in supporting addictions. It is a serious epidemic in this country.


Closer to home, I experienced many new things this year. I completed my first year in a new and exciting position. I overcame the feeling of helplessness that weighed me down for the entire first year. I found my niche and made progress.


In May, I graduated from UMUC and felt a huge sense of accomplishment. This opened at least one door for me at work that I am waiting to walk through. I'll write about that in the 2011 blog.


On the social front, I made some new friends. Some from work, some from school and some from my congregation. It's opened up my circle of friends. I don't make friends easily, so I was surprised by the relationships that were formed this past year. But on the flip side, I realized that some relationships seem to have waned. I don't know what to do about them.


Here's my final thought: reflection needs to happen all year long. Self correction can and should occur on an as-needed basis. I welcome that inner reflection and actually find it very useful. Don't wait until January 1st.